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I forget sometimes
that you are not the person I once knew.
And I say something the way I used to
quick, without context, off the cuff
things that the person I once knew would catch
NOT with a ‘what?’ and a frown
nor with a ‘I have no idea what you're talking about’
but with a wink and a smile, because you got it.
You got me without the subtext.
But that was then.
And I sometimes forget that this is now.
You are still my favorite person
but now, I need to catch your attention before I speak
To give reference to context – because you will have forgotten.
I need to speak clearly and slowly
and wait for the spark to light in your eyes
– or not –
before I add more words to the cacophony
that is roaring in your head.
Or is it the silence that deafens you?
You won't tell me,
or you can't.
But you're still my favorite person,
And I try really hard,
but sometimes I forget
and then we have a day like today
with you cross and resentful at something
that I didn't tell you the moment it happened
– like you expected me to –
except that I did, but you've forgotten….
so when I speak without context
when I speak without reminding you
the light in your eyes sparks once, furious,
then dies into sullen indifference –
only because I forgot that you're not the person I once knew –
quick and sharp and funny and trusting –
even though you're still my favorite person.
Competing interests None declared.
Provenance and peer review Not commissioned; internally peer reviewed.