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Hi, I'm Lisa, I'll be your chaperone
today, for your comfort and the doctor's.
While we await his arrival, let me
assure you that my presence in this room
is standard procedure, normal practice,
kind of like when you were kids at a dance
or on a fieldtrip to a museum,
just a precaution, although I've never,
well, that's not true, maybe once, but I'm old,
Honey, enough to be your mother, seen
either a doctor or patient behave
inappropriately for this exam,
which the more I think about it the more
I'd compare to a dance, not a fieldtrip,
call it the gynecologic two-step,
a-one-and-a-two, first the breast exam,
arms up, the left, then the right, followed by
sliding down to the edge, feet up into
the foot holders, hips relaxed, ending with
a deep breath and twirl of the cyto brush.
It'll be over before you know it.
Any questions before we get started?
Competing interests None.
Provenance and peer review Not commissioned; internally peer reviewed.
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